Wednesday, December 31, 2008

G-MAN's top ten favorite movies of 2008

So, here it is, My favorite movies of the year list. Are you ready? Are you ready for this? Are you hanging on the edge of your seat?!? Okay, I should stop it with the Queen references & start the list. not all of these movies are necessarily movies that will be nominated for "Best picture" or that stuff, but this the list of film I enjoyed the most this year.

# 10

"Wanted"

I put this film pretty low on the list because it wasn't such a story driven film, but it succeeded in what it was trying to be....an exciting action film.

# 9

"Clover Field"

This is the best horror movie I've seen since "Signs". It's scary, exciting, interesting & an all around great piece of film making!

# 8

"Be Kind, Rewind"

This is one of the most original movies I've seen in a long time. It's just to bad it didn't do well at the box office.

# 7

"Max Payne"

I feel this movie was VERY underrated. I hate how people complained that it was "boring". People, it was trying to be a detective film, not a shoot-em-up! I also REALLY hate how people complained about one scene where Max turns around to shoot a guy in SLOW motion, and every one kept ranting that one scene. I didn't like that part too, but did that thirty second scene destroy the whole movie? NO! So get over it!

# 6

"Iron Man"

Despite I liked this movie a lot, I put the film lower of the list because it's VERY overrated. But it is still a well done film.

# 5

"The Incredible Hulk"

Great action scenes & good writing is enough for Me put this movie on the list.

# 4

"Indiana Jones 4"

While not as good as "Raiders" or "Last Crusade", it's way better than "Temple of Doom".

# 3

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"

I really hope this film is nominated for the four major Academy awards (Best picture, Best director, Best actor & Best actress). I believe David Fincher's master piece reaches the quality of "Forrest Gump".

# 2

"RAMBO IV"

Stallone has done a great job with this movie. I think it's the best film in the series since the original "First Blood". Lets hope "RAMBO V" is just as good.

# 1

"The Dark Knight"

Not much of a surprise here. This is the best movie I've seen this decade so far, and not only needs a nomination for best picture, but deserves to win!

I'm "The G-MAN", and have a happy new year!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

G-MAN's top six movies to see in 2009

#6

"Edge of Darkness"

I'm really excited for this film because it's first time Mel Gibson has stared in something since "Signs".



#5
"Terminator : Salvation"

It's looking pretty interesting. But because the trailers have mostly been teaser trailers & have been fairly secretive, I put this film lower on the list.

#4

"Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince"

I've always been a fan of the "Harry Potter" film series, so I'm defiantly going to see this movie.

#3

"RAMBO V"

I'm not joking, this is actually coming out! But because Stallone has done a great job with "RAMBO IV", I'm pretty excited for this film.

#2

"WATCHMEN"

The graphic novel just might be My favorite book ever. So why did I only put this film at "number two"? It's because the studio announced that the film was originally going to be three-and-a-half hours long, but cut an ENTIRE HOUR FROM THE FILM! Cutting twenty minutes from a three-and-a-half hour movie is already hitting below-the-belt, but cutting an hour is a lethal blow! Lets just hope the collector's edition box set makes up for this.

#1

"Gran Torino"

I know it's already out in select theaters, but I can't see it until the 2009 world wide release. Clint Eastwood just might be My favorite actor, so I'm pretty excited for that alone. Only problem, it's just too bad that this wasn't "Dirty Harry 6".


- G-MAN

Monday, December 29, 2008

Honorary mention


HONORARY MENTION- Worst movies of the year:
"Prince Caspian"
I love the books, but I hate the recent Walden media movies, for two reasons. First, most of the films consist of countless battle scenes, making the movies repetitive. Second, for some reason, the Christian themes feel watered down for wider audience.

HONORARY MENTION- Best movies of the year
"Quantum of Solace"Link
This was an entertaining movie, but it just wasn't all to memorable. Although, I don't really think this movie deserves to go on a lot of people's most disappointing films of the year. I wasn't disappointed, but that's only because I wasn't excited for the film in the first place, so it was better than I expected. That, and I haven't been a "James Bond" fan for a long time.

- G-MAN

Sunday, December 28, 2008

G-MAN's top four most hated movies of 2008


#4: "The Mummy-Tomb of the Dragon Emperor"
This whole movie is EXTREMELY repetitive, the acting is terrible, the writing is cheesy & it's just all around stupid. Enough said.

#3: "The Spirit"
I can't believe that for more than sixty years, comic book fans waited around the world waited for this ground breaking comic book series to get a big-screen adaptation, only to get this load of garbage!

#2: "Fog Warning"
I know, it hasn't come to theaters yet, but I saw it in the year 2008, so it qualifies for the list in My opinion. Believe it or not, the film is actually going to be released eventually. A release date hasn't been announced yet, but an official website has been put up on the internet already.

#1: "Meet the Spartans"
This isn't just the worst movie I've seen this year, it's the worst movie I've seen in My whole life!

I'm the G-MAN, goodbye.

G-MAN reviews "The Curiuos Case of Benjamin Button"

Oaky, I just saw "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button", so lets get the review started.

"Benjamin Button" involves a man (played by Brad Pitt) who ages backwards. He's born an old man, and goes through his life getting younger & younger. The film mostly focuses on Benjamin falling in love with Daisy (played by Cate Blanchett).

The film is based off a short 1921 story by F. Scott Fitzgerald. I'm surprised it took so long to even consider making into a movie.

Over the course of the film, Benjamin meets many memorable characters. The film kind of reminds Me of "Forrest Gump" (which isn't much of a surprise, sense the screenwriter of "Forrest Gump" also did the screenplay for this film).

Brad Pitt did a GREAT job as Benjamin. I actually forgot it was Brad Pitt, which is good if you're an actor. Cate Blanchett also did very well. The cinematography is very well done. You know what. Instead of rambling on about how great this movie is, I'm going to list all the Academy awards I think it deserves to be nominated.

Best picture
Best director- David Fincher
Best actor- Brad Pitt
Best actress- Cate Blanchett
Best cinematography
Best special effects
Best make up



HITS
Great story
Great acting
Great directing
Great cinematography
Great special effects
Great make up

MISSES
None

OVERALL: This is, easily, one of the best films of the year. I do hope it's nominated for "Best picture", although I'm hoping "The Dark Knight" wins.

G-MAN gives "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" a "Perfect Ten" out of "Ten".

Friday, December 26, 2008

G-MAN reviews "The Spirit"

Thank God that Will Eisner is dead. Cause if that bypass surgery complication didn't kill him, seeing his hard work & creativity turned into this turd of a film would have. I am of course talking about Frank Miller's "The Spirit".

The story of "The Spirit" (or the closest thing that counts as a story) involves a cop, Danny Colt, being killed, comes back from the dead, & starts to fight crime.

That's just the back story, let's get to the main plot. The plot is about "The Spirit" trying to track down "The Octopus" (played by Samuel L. Jackson), who is trying to, pay attention, trying find & then drink the blood of Hercules. I'm not joking, the story is just SO stupid! Meanwhile, The Spirit is ALSO trying to track down his childhood sweetheart, Sand Serif.

The film is plagued by TERRIBLE writing. I'll give you a few examples. All of the worst lines I can remember come from Sam Jackson, so all the worst lines come from THE SAME GUY!

"I'm The Octopus, I've got eight of everything!"- Ugh!

"She's got a thing for the bling"- When I heard that line, I expected John Shaft & Isaac Hayes to appear.

There's also an obnoxious recurring joke involving, I'm NOT making this up, eggs!

Example: "There's nothing I like better than kicking your ass....accept maybe eggs."- I don't get it, what the hell do eggs have to do with anything & how is that meant to be funny?!?!

Another flaw is that, during a scene, one of the very few objects in the background that has any color is a bottle of purified water. Shameless marketing bull s***!

One of the biggest problems is that this movie can be construed as "sexist"! The sexism isn't even subtle, EVERY women in the movie wheres tight and/or reveling outfits. Even if there are some women in the film that AREN'T scantily clad, they're portrayed as damsels in distress.

I really hate how people keep listing this film as "film noir". Film noir has corrupt cops, while all the cops in this movie aren't corrupt, they're incompetent & all around unreliable. Just because the movie has a film noir art design, that doesn't mean it's film noir!

The last problem I have with it is that not even the action scenes can save the movie. During the climax, guess what the villain's strategy is- constantly shooting up in the air like IDIOTS!!!!

So, is there ANYTHING that I like? Well, there are actually parts that are so bad, they're funny again.

HITS
So bad, it's funny again (only sometimes, though)

MISSES
Poorly constructed story
Awful writing
Sexist
Doesn't count as "film noir"
God-awful action scenes

OVERALL: It's clear that Frank Miller didn't care for the film at all. He was probably thinking "nobody's gonna care about a campy AND stupid story. It's a comic book movie, did they expect a good movie?"
Ever sense "The Dark Knight", there's no longer ANY excuse to not take the story of a comic book move seriously.

G-MAN gives "The Spirit" a "Horrible Two" out of 'Ten"!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

G-MAN reviews "A Christmas Story"

Today's Christmas Eve, & it's time for My last Christmas movie review! Lets get started!

"A Christmas Story" is based of book, "In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash", a series of short stories by Jean Shepard. The plot of the film involves a kid named "Ralphie" trying to convince his parents into buying a Red Ryder BB gun for Christmas.

The best actor in the movie is Jean Shepard as "adult Ralphie". The whole film is told through the point of view of an adult looking back on his child hood in the 1950's. Shepard gets all the best lines, such as: "Getting ready for school was like trying to get ready for extended deep sea diving!" Jean Shepard actually makes a cameo.(Jean Shepard's cameo)

I really like the soundtrack. It doesn't appear to be sold any where though.

You remember that time when you accidentally sward in front of your parents? Or when you gave into the "triple dog dare"? Well, this movie has scenes involving that stuff happens to the main character(s). That's the best thing about this movie. Even though it takes place in the 50's, it's easy to relate to & is almost timeless.

HITS
Easy to relate to
Funny
Great narration by Jean Shepard
Good acting
Good soundtrack

MISSES
None

OVERALL: This is My favorite Christmas movie ever! If you catch it on TV, watch it, you won't regret it. Merry Christmas!

G-MAN gives "A Christmas Story" a "Perfect Ten" out of "Ten"!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

G-MAN reviews "Gremlins"

One more week until Christmas Eve! So, it's time for Me to review another Christmas movie classic.

"Gremlins" starts out with an inventor in China Town, NY. While there, he stops at a Chinese magic shop, and buys a Mogwai, a mysterious creature from China. He later gives the creature to his son, billy (played by Zack Gilligan) as a Christmas present. The mogwai is then named "gizmo".

Now there's three rules when keeping a mogwai. (1) You have to keep them from getting wet, other wise they'll multiply. By the way, most of them are NOT friendly, gizmo was just an exception. (2) You DON'T want to feed them after midnight, then they'll go through a transformation into Gremlins, little monstrous creatures that wreak havoc & like to cause pranks that could risk killing people. (3) sunlight will kill them & bright lights will hurt them. Although, at this point, that's what you want.

This film has a great sense of dark comedy. The main source of dark comedy is the mayhem happening on Christmas. The film kind of reminds Me of old movies like "The Blob". Actually, much like in "The Blob", this movie has a movie theater scene. Jerry Goldsmith did a great job with the music. I found My self humming the "Gremlins theme". The film also has some well done pacing, it never drags.

My only problem with the film is that it's not perfect, I don't know what it was in the film, but it just wasn't perfect.


HITS
Great dark comedy
Good acting
Great music
Well done pacing

MISSES
Just wasn't perfect


OVERALL: If you're looking for a strange dark comedy, this one's for you.

G-MAN gives "Gremlins" an "Awesome Nine" out of "ten"!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

G-MAN reviews "Die Hard"

"Die Hard" is considered the greatest action movie ever made & is on IMDB's 250 greatest movies in history. The film takes place on Christmas Eve & is on Movie phone's top 25 greatest Christmas movies, so that's enough to make Me review in December.

"Die Hard" is about a New York cop, John McClain (played by Bruce Willis), who goes to LA, so he can fix his marriage with his wife, Holly McClain. Although, when he arrives to the Nakatomi Plaza (where Holly works), the plaza goes under attack by terrorists who are trying to rob the plaza of $600, 000,000. Now John McClain needs to stop the terrorists & save his wife, save other hostages & survive Christmas Eve.

Bruce Willis is great as John McClain. He manages to be cool, funny, but not perfect at the same time. He's more realistic than most action characters, because he has to use what ever he can find to survive. Alan Rickman is also great as Hans Gruber (the main villain). The writing is pretty good & the action scenes are also well done. The film also has a lot of classic quotes, such as:"Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho!" &, most notably, "Yippee Ki Yay, mother f*%$#@".

Although, the film is far from flawless. First, it takes a while for the action to start. Second, the film is WAY to long. I don't know about you, but I was tired out by the middle of the film. Third, if you're a "Rambo" fan, you wont get the shoot-em-up you where hoping for. Fourth & lastly, the movie is overrated. It's NOT the greatest action movie ever, There are better ones like "Dirty Harry".

HITS
Well written
Well acted
Great action scenes
Classic quotes

MISSES
Extremely overrated
Slow pacing
Way to long
Way to boring for "Rambo" fans

OVERALL: If you want to watch an action movie instead of a mushy children's Christmas movie, than this is for you.

G-MAN gives "Die Hard" an "awesome nine" out of "ten"!

Monday, December 8, 2008

G-MAN's soap box: upcoming remakes (part 2)

With all these remakes, what's next? James Cameron's "JAWS"? Jason Statham in "Blade Runner"? Dwayne Johnson as "Dirty Harry"? Or Uwe Boll's "Star Wars: Episodes 4-6"?!?

Although, I came to talk about a remake more shocking than all those films combined. I came to talk about the rumors surrounding a possible remake of what is considered to be the greatest movie of all time. If you have the AFI 100 greatest movies list, you probably know what I'm talking about. I'm here to talk about the possibility of the remake of.... "CITIZEN KANE"!

When I first heard about this, My jaw dropped. My reaction was:"Oh My God! You heartless idiots at holly wood!"

Actually, there's two rumors about a "Citizen Kane" remake. The first one involves Oliver Stone directing the film & renaming it "KANE". The other rumor is much more horrific. The other rumor is that "M TV films" will be doing a modernized version of the film. "How is that horrific?" you may ask. It's more horrific because the M TV remake is meant to have Joel Schumacher to be directing (yes, this is the same guy who directed the crap-fest, "Batman & Robin").

If this rumor is true, than Justin Timberlake is meant to be playing Charles Foster Kane.
I can't imagine Timberlake running for Governor. Actually, I can't imagine Timberlake running a news paper. Well, in the supposed remake, he's supposed to run a record company. Why? Because Schumacher wants newer audiences to be able to relate to Kane. Another thing I heard is that "Rosebud" is going to be changed into a snow board.



(If Joel Schumacher is reading this, and really is doing a remake of "Citizen Kane") Don't make Kane someone you can relate to! What makes the first film so great is that Kane is an enigma.

I hope this rumor isn't true, but I'd rther have Oliver Stone direct the film if the rumors are true. I don't like Stone or Schumacher, but at least Oliver Stone didn't make one of the worst movies of all time.

Thank God Orson Welles didn't live to see this! I'm the G-MAN, goodbye.

Friday, December 5, 2008

"Sly 2 : Band of Thieves" comic strip

A comic strip I found on the internet. If you played "Sly 2" all the way through, you'll probably get the joke.
Don't worry, I'll tell you what else is being remade in My next post. Goodbye.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

G-MAN's soap box: upcoming remakes

Remember in My "It's A Wonderful Life" review saying "Let's hope holly wood doesn't ruin this classic by remaking it",well, at this point, I'll be disappointed, but not surprised if they do.

A lot people HATE remakes. Well, I guess a lot will be pissed off with the upcoming decade, because there's a hell load of remakes coming the next decade. Actually, years from now, film historians & movie buffs will remember the 2010's as "the decade of "the remake". You won't believe the amount of remakes coming out. There's remakes of "12 Angry Men" (simply entitled "12") & "The Day The Earth Stood Still" coming out this month.

There's also remakes of "Highlander", "DUNE", "The Evil Dead", "Karate Kid", "Friday The 13th", "A Nightmare on Elm Street" & "Maniac" coming out. You might be saying "how is that enough remakes to label the 2010's "the decade of the remake"? ", well, those aren't all the remakes coming out soon. Holly wood seems to be remaking EVERYTHING.

They're remaking "Poltergeist", "It's Alive", "Revenge of the Nerds", "Terror Train", "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes", "Porky's", "Piranha", "Suspiria", "Last Unicorn","Romancing The Stone", "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" & John Carpenter's "They Live"!

Now let's get to the ridicules remakes (as if the other ones weren't ridicules?). There's a "Red Dawn" remake. Didn't the Soviet Union fall apart nearly twenty years ago? There's also a remake of, believe it or not, "Plan 9 from Outer Space"!
Now, studios are also in consideration of remaking "The Godfather"! Have they no souls?!?!

The next movie that's in consideration of being remade is SO shocking, that I have to make a full article about it! If You're a film buff, Your jaw will drop when You hear what else might be remade. I'll reveal what might be remade in My next post, goodbye.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

G-MAN reviews "It's A Wonderful Life"

Hello, it's the G-MAN here! As you already know, Christmas is upon us, so I felt that I should review some beloved Christmas movie classics through out the month of December. My first review of the month is "It's A Wonderful Life". It was nominated five Oscars (including "Best Picture") & ranks at number 20 on the AFI's 2007 edition of the 100 "Greatest Movies Ever Made". Now, lets start the review!

The film is about George Baily (played by James Stewart) , who starts having a miserable life.
The film is seen through flashbacks of George's life from the point of view of an angel, Clarence, and, what appears to be, God Himself. At one point, George attempts suicide, but the Clarence (the angel) saves him. George then wishes that he'd never been born, he lives through a miserable reality where he was never born and realizes that he & everyone else in the world are important.

So, yeah, it's a light hearted Frank Capra movie. Even though every one knows about the "I wish I was never born" thing, but that doesn't happen until very late into the movie. Most of the movie is really just George's life leading up to what makes him want to commit Suicide.
It's a good looking movie, I don't know what it is about the cinematography that I like about, I just do.

HITS
Well written story
Great acting
Great directing
Great cinematography

MISSES
None


OVERALL: This is a CLASSIC to say the least. If you're looking for a light hearted feel-good Christmas movie, this is for You. Let's just hope holly wood doesn't ruin this classic by remaking it.

G-MAN gives "It's A Wonderful Life" a "Perfect Ten" out of Ten.